Stuck in the Muck

  This book may not happen. It’s like a diet. I’ve made it past the first month and have started to realize that this is a lifestyle change.

  Shoot, I’m just a guy in a house in the middle of a town. If this thing isn’t written, who will know? If a thing isn’t made, then folks aren’t going to miss it. I’ve got some soul searching to do, I guess.

 Let me bring you up to speed. I had another recurring dream last night.

  I wrote it down in the journal that I’m keeping at the bedside. That was dream number five. From the journal, I copy them into the short stories / book thing that I’m putting together.

  Looking through the journal, I continue to have this weird feeling. The dreams feel… sent. Or received. How can I describe them? OK, think in this way: You are walking down a path in a park and you find a phone lying on the ground. It’s one that can take pictures and film stuff. Giving in to that moment of weakness, you discover that the phone isn’t locked, so you dig in. You find some files that have been filmed, and you check them out.

  Who’s going to know, right?

  After a few of them, you start to feel funny about what you are watching. It’s like the scenes that were filmed were real. Normal people. Normal environments. Normal reactions.

  The problem with the scenes are the fact that they are filmed at all.

  Every one of them is a unique moment. Like a garden party where the fountain sprays the guests with wine, and the camera is there at the right moment. Or the guy jumping off the diving board and the board breaks, and the camera is there at the right moment.

  But the camera has a LOT of them on file. The date stamps are too close for comfort too. See what I mean?

  Too many coincidences.

  ESP? Time travel? Great set ups, actors, and scripting?

  Anyway, that’s the way these dreams are starting to feel.

  Too coincidental.

  Too real.

  Too terrible.

  Ultimately, I have to remind myself that they are dreams. None of it is real. Like a thriller flick or a TV show done right… and that’s the thing. I’m not sure the writing is the ‘right stuff’ for… anything. I’m thinking about mothballing this whole project and getting back into Real Life. We’ll see how things go next week.

-I.K.